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Wednesday, August 9, 2017

Marriage is Tough But Can Be So Worth It #RB4U @melissa_keir #second_chance


Marriage Matters

Hello and welcome to another blog on matters of the heart. I'm back for another scintillating post on love and romance. Be sure to chime in your two cents. The more the merrier.


This time of year, marriage is on my mind. My daughter celebrated her first wedding anniversary on Monday (Aug. 7th) and I celebrated my eleventh yesterday. Both were pretty low key but were wonderful reminders of the commitment made. My daughter's wedding was held at a local church with the reception at the Howell Opera House. It was a beautiful but small event. She and her husband celebrated their anniversary in their new apartment. They recently moved from Michigan to Oklahoma for his job and are off on a new adventure far from family and friends. I'm so excited for them because I know it will bring them closer together and strengthen their marriage.


My husband and I are on our second marriage. We each had been married for 20 and 15 years respectively but things didn't work out, no matter how hard we tried. When we decided to marry, we went for something fun--a Vegas chapel. No Elvis but just the two of us. And we couldn't be happier today. 

I'm not going to say it is always easy but this time around, things are better (easier?). We are more understanding and accepting of differences as well as better in tune with our own needs. In the last 11 years, there's not been one fight. But still it takes work. There's a great deal of give and take... but also a little of "is this really a big deal?" or "is this worth an argument?" Most often, the answer is no. I have to say it helps that he does understand me (maybe because he has so many of the same quirks). 


Even though, I'm divorced, I still feel bad when another person's marriage doesn't work. I believe in the dream of one person for all time. This morning, I was sad to read about Chris Pratt and Anna Farris' separation on Facebook. What a blow to their family. Hollywood marriages don't have a great track record but I thought they'd had a strong partnership.  They had appeared to be such a loving couple, sharing images and teasing each other on social media. Both were super supportive of the other's career. But since I wasn't involved in the marriage, I don't know what really happened. Often one presents a different image in public than what's really going on in private. 


Divorce and finding love again is one of my themes I like to write about in my books. Maybe because I know it's possible but either way, I believe everyone deserves a happily ever after. In my book, Crash and Burn, my characters are faced with a life and death situation which gives them a chance to rethink their marriage. Sometimes, life and death is what it takes.


Crash and Burn:
Can Rob and Keira's second honeymoon lead to romance, or will it crash and burn?


On the verge of a divorce, Rob and Keira Matthews book a second honeymoon at the urging of their counselor. Unable to conceive, they've pushed each other away in an effort to protect their hearts. Will a romantic holiday be the ticket to love or a plane crash in disaster?


EXCERPT:
Her husband stomped away in a huff. His damp clothes accentuated his fit body. The many nights he’d spent lately at the gym had firmed and toned his already-sexy body into a dream machine. Yeah, and all those other women ogling him. Too bad the gym didn’t do more for his attitude. I heard his comment. Why does he always have to push my buttons? He really shouldn’t have expected me to go walking, looking for…. She shivered. What if there were bodies? I wonder if anyone else survived the crash. I’ve got better things to do. Maybe I’ll find out this island is really a resort like in that romance novel I read. Then I can save the day.

She picked up Gris and gave him a kiss on the nose. “Little man, you’d never get mad at me. Let’s go find ourselves the perfect place to rest. Maybe we can prove to that man I’m capable.” With the dog settled in her arms, Keira headed inland, away from the beach and toward the jungle.

Trees filled her vision. Their dense foliage provided shelter and had allowed moss to cover the ground. She welcomed the softness under her feet. She noticed the drop in temperature as well. The blistering sun from the beach dappled through the leaves and created a cool, welcoming environment. The sound of birds and other animals teased her hearing. She paused and inhaled. A flowery fragrance filled the air.

The trees are so thick, I can’t see more than five feet in front of me. I hope there aren’t any snakes. Her stomach knotted. Snakes or lack of food? She pulled Gris closer to her, absently running her fingers through his fur. I’m sure there’s no coffee joint or five-star hotel around here. I would’ve seen something before now. Rats. I was really hoping for the happy ending of a romance novel.

Available in print and ebook at Amazon

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Thank you for stopping by today and sharing a few moments of your day with me. What do you do exciting for your anniversary? How long have you been married? Or share your favorite memory of your spouse. I'd love to hear from you.

Until next month...











Melissa Keir

13 comments:

Vicki Batman, sassy writer said...

Happy anniversary to you! Marriage is work and just daily life challenges can throw it wonky. We get through with lots of humor and nice sidelong looks. LOL

Melissa Keir said...

Hi Vicki- My husband likes to call me out when I give him the "rolling eyes" movement. :) Laughter is always the best part of a marriage. When you laugh together, it's easier to go to sleep happy.

Anonymous said...

Happy anniversary to you, Melissa, and your daughter/son-in-law! MR N and I just celebrated our 13th anniversary and while many of our friends have (unfortunately) gone through divorces, I'm so blessed to have never gone through it. Marriage is more than the wedding and just living together. It's a partnership and I firmly believe that it takes commitment on both sides. Respect, love, honesty and intimacy all play their role making a marriage blissful. There will be ups and downs but with each obstacle, the couple grows closer together. We have never had a fight but discuss everything (from finances to purchases to children to vacations to dreams). We've gone through a lot these past thirteen years but are closer than ever!

Beautiful post on marriage. :)

Melissa Keir said...

Thank you Mrs. N. Both you and Mr. N are blessed. I believe that marriage is something that isn't out of reach for anyone which is why I do feature so many broken marriages or even second marriages in my books.

Tina Donahue said...

Happy Anniversary, Melissa. Beautiful photos. :)

Melissa Keir said...

Thank you Tina! :)

Judy Baker said...

Happy Anniversary Melissa and many more. I agree, marriage is a challenge even if its only the couple, add kids and there's another challenge mixed with the marriage. My hubby and I have been married 45 years and it's still a challenge! But, worth it. Communication and giving me my space, as well as his, has probably been the things that keeps us together. Best of luck with your book.

Melissa Keir said...

Thank you Judy. I do agree about the blended family making it more of a challenge. We have found that most often the issues crop up with our own children, rather than the marriage itself. Congrats on 45 years! What a testament to marriage!

jbiggar said...

Happy anniversary to you and your daughter! Marriage takes effort on both sides but it's worth it :)

Melissa Keir said...

Thank you! You are so correct! :)

Krista said...

Happy Anniversary Melissa ! 2nd marriages and blended families are definitely a tough road, one i know all too well and same with us, it's more times than not that we have more of the kid problems than with anything between the two of us. Any marriage takes work and both have to be willing to make an effort. Sure do love my hubby though :)

Paris said...

Happy Anniversary, and may you enjoy many more! Your new book sounds great, best of luck:)

jean hart stewart said...

Happy Anniversary and many more. Loved your post,,,,,

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