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Sunday, April 18, 2021

I Don't Know How She Does It


 I am a spinster (unmarried and childless) but I am an aunt and a grand-aunt. Yesterday, my seven-year-old grand-nephew and two-year-old grand-niece stayed the night with me. I love spending time with them, hearing about their lives, interests, jokes, and seeing their personalities. It brings much joy to my life. 

But by the next day, my mind is numb and my body feels like nothing more than melted butter. I always wonder how my niece does it every day. 

The sibling bickering (I remember them from growing up with an older brother), the frantic play, and the noise. That doesn't include helping with school, bathing, feeding and doing all the other stuff mothers do. 

I must confess that I have always been in awe of mothers. From my own to others who make magic happen during difficult times, who work full-time then come home to be a mom. I am in awe of the mothers who become pregnant and lose the child they yearn to hold. The mothers who birth a child that never takes a breath or the mothers who lose a child after hours, days, weeks, months, and years of loving and only to have their hearts shredded and their souls diminished. 

Motherhood is a fearful yet brave act that the world treats as a normal occurrence but is truly a miracle. And not just because of the life that is carried. To give your life to the betterment of another. To sacrifice, to have moments of great worry, great happiness, and everything that happens in between those moments. I am not that brave. But to all the mothers out there, I don't know how you do it. But as a daughter who loves her mother more than anything, I am glad you do it and thankful that you do. 

So, be kinder to yourselves. And give yourself a pat on the back and take a moment to care for yourself. You deserve it. 

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