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Saturday, June 17, 2017

A visiting friend snapped this picture of me the other day. Since it's one of the few taken of me I like I'm posting it here. That's my printer in back of me. You might call it my work corner. I have files and bulky stuff in another room, but my computer can look up any fact I need so I do my writing here.

Now for some crazy stuff from the Cynical Philosopher. You can tell me your favorite later.

1. I read that 4,153,237 people got married last year.  Not to cause any trouble, but shouldn't be an even number?

2. Today a man knocked on my door and asked for a small donation towards the local swimming pool.  I gave him a  glass of water.

3. I want to die peacefully in my sleep like my grandfather did. Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car.

4. I find it ironic the the colors red, white and blue stand for freedom until they are flashing behind you.

5. When wearing a bikini women reveal 90% of their body. Men are so polite they only look at the covered parts.

6. A  recent study has shown that women who carry a little extra weight live longer than the men who mention it.

7. America is a country which produce who will cross the ocean to fight for democracy but won't cross the street to vote.

8. You know that little tingly feeling you get when you like somebody? That's your common sense leaving your body.

9. Did you know that dolphins are so smart that after a few weeks of captivity they can train people to stand at the edge of the water and throw them fish?

10. My therapist says I have a preoccupation with vengeance.  We'll see about that!

11. I think my neighbor is stalking me as she's been  googling my name on her computer. I saw it through my telescope lat night.

12. Money talks, but all mine says is good-bye.

13. Relationships are a lot like algebra.  Have you ever looked at your X and wondered Y?

14. If you think nobody cares if you're dead or  alive try missing a couple pf payments.

And now it's time for you to pick a favorite. Let's see if you get any kind of consensus here. I'll tell you mu pick later.


Tina Donahue said...

Beautiful picture, Jean! I love them all, but I think #1 is my fave. :)

Melissa Keir said...

So funny! How can I pick just one!

Paris said...

You look great! I love the new photo:) All of them were so funny but I think the one that stands out is #6) about women who carry a little more weight living longer than the men who mention it. LOL! That one had me giggling and gets my vote. Love your writing space, BTW :)

jean hart stewart said...

Thanks, Tina. No. 1 cracked me up too. Melissa, I agree it's hard to pick. I guess I'll go with the neighbor and the telescope, though. Paris, so glad you like the column. I'm a sucker for humor like that.

Harlie Williams said...

#13 is my favorite.

Awesome picture of you!


jean hart stewart said...

I agree #13 is very clever...thanks so much for commenting..

Marianne Stephens said...

Funny! Nice photo.
#6 - women who carry a little extra weight live longer. Ah, yes. Men better not say anything except, "You look great!

Cara Marsi said...

Great picture of you. I liked all the sayings. Since I have to pick one I'd say #6.

jean hart stewart said...

Marianne and Cara....Thanks for commenting. Looks like no,6 is the favorite. It definitely rang the most bells... I've got more of these for next month, incidentally.

Judy Baker said...

Great picture. Yup, I'll have to go with #6 too!

Janice Seagraves said...

LOL Love your humor.

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