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Monday, September 17, 2012

Punographics and more

The world and its problems suddenly leave me wanting to escape from all the bombastic political stuff going on right now. I’ll be a good girl and vote, of course, but nothing is likely to change my mind at this late date. So I’m putting it aside and going to give some punographics.
1. I changed my iPod’s name to Titanic. It’s syncing now.

2. I stayed up all night to see where the sun went. Then it dawned on me.

3. PMS jokes aren’t funny. Period. 

4. When chemists die, they barium. 

5. Broken pencils are pointless.

6. Velcro---what a rip off! 

7. The earthquake in Washington obviously was the government’s fault. 

Don’t you feel better now? Courtesy of John Milosh, I have a bunch more if everybody clamors to read more.Just let me know.
And naturally I’ve got to, just gotta get in a plug for my newest release from Ellora’s Cave. Stormy Pursuit made its debut TODAY, and I’m thrilled to see it published. Release day is always so special. This is the second in what I hope will be a series of eight on my sexy, pointed ear elves.

Blurb for Stormy:

How can the twin daughters of Lars, that powerful elf, manage to get in so much trouble? Both of them falling in love at the same time with men who they think they can never have! When Lars sets out to bring down a villainous enemy will he manage to save his daughters? Or lose them and their loves in a fiery death engineered by the villain? 

Excerpt:
“I’m happy to see you, Chief Inspector,” she murmured. “How nice of you to call.”

He shot her a disgusted look. “Don’t be coy, Lady Quinby. You know very well this is not a nice call.”

Quinn’s heart skipped a beat. Nothing underhanded about this man. She raised her eyes and looked into his, almost staggering with the impact as his dark eyes met her green ones. She knew she should trust him with all her secrets, but she didn’t quite have the courage. However, she’d make a start. She couldn’t bear to let this animosity continue when she longed for him to wrap her in his arms and kiss her problems away. Why did she have to fall in love with the one man she couldn’t have?

Even as the thought reverberated in her brain, she realized with a shock she’d done exactly that. She’d fallen irrevocably in love with a man who’d hate her if he knew who she was. She took a few steps closer, her eyes pleading and touched his chest with both hands.

The response was instant. Swept up in strong arms, he captured her lips with a deep kiss. Plunging an expert tongue into her mouth that swept around and then settled into a plunging motion that had her clinging to him. He seemed to relish the taste of her. He acted as if he could not get enough of kissing her in this new but welcome matter. He had her not only clinging, but trying to get every inch of her against his solid frame. She squirmed against him, loving his strong body and perfectly agreeable to anything he wanted to teach her.

Instead he put his hands on her shoulders and pushed her away. Not roughly, thank the gods above, but still he set her from him.

“Quinby. You’ve got me at a disadvantage here. How can you kiss me like that if you’ve taken Phillips as your lover? I didn’t think you that depraved.”

She almost slapped him. How could he say such things?

Because to him the facts are the facts, and he’s seen you twice coming for Lawful Progression office, early and with no reason for being there.

“I resent that. He’s not my lover. You insult me by the implications of that remark.”

She deliberately raised her elfin ears so they were more visible. To make sure he understood, she swept her blonde hair from her face.

Max stared at her in fascination. “You’re an elf as well as your father. Do you know those ears only add to your beauty? May I touch one?”

His reverent tone destroyed any resistance she had, and she moved to his arms. He seemed consumed with wonder as he kissed the tip of each ear, gently as if they were jewels beyond compare.

“I was so afraid they’d repel you,” she muttered against his strong chest.

 He shook his head, fingering her hair and ears with a sweetly reverent touch. Then the attraction between them caught fire in relentless passion and they both exploded. He captured her lips with possessive greed as they clung to the other and learned the glories of each other’s body. His hands trembled as they roamed over her, cupping her breasts first, then moving down her as if he seemed to want to savor every curve. He explored her body quickly but thoroughly, lingering over her curved hips, then moving his large hands over to her stomach. Quinn’s body quivered beneath his touch." 

13 comments:

Tina Donahue said...

LOL - what a great post, Jean - and on a Monday!! Takes a lot to make me laugh at the beginning of the EDJ work week. :)

jean hart stewart said...

Thanks, Tina. Don't know where all those extra spaces came from though. The mysteries of the web!

Sandy said...

Jean,
I'm so with you about being sick of politics. Get it over with now.

More jokes. lol

jean hart stewart said...

I hate this political times of year and it will only get worse for a while. UGH...

Renee Vincent said...

hahahha those were great Jean! I so wish I had enough wit to come up with those on my own. I love oneliners like that seem so obvious, yet you didn't see the punch line coming before hand.

And great excerpt too! Thanks for sharing with us.

Renee Vincent said...

Hey Jean, I took the spaces out of your post for you. Hope that was okay. haha

jean hart stewart said...

Thanks, Renee... computers always baffle me...glad I"ve got smart friends!!

Paris said...

LOL! Loved the puns. I'm a huge fan of one-liners:)

Great excerpt and congratulations on the new release!

Katalina said...

What a wonderful combo, groan worthy puns, which I love and a terrific excerpt!
Thank you Jean, I do feel better.
XXOO Kat

Renee Vincent said...

My pleasure, Jean!

Molly Daniels said...

LOVE puns!!! And Happy Release Day!!

jean hart stewart said...

Thanks, Kat, Paris and Molly!!! I've got more of those puns stashed away, so guess what my next blog will be!!!

Dawn Montgomery said...

ROFLMAO. Okay the puns made me laugh!!!! I love them!

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