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Friday, July 27, 2012

Why Do Women Writers Feel Guilty by Janice Seagraves


Why Do Women Writers Feel Guilty?
By Janice Seagraves

There’s a writer I know who says she feels guilty every time she works on her next book, because her three sons are eating microwave popcorn for dinner. I’ve seen a photo of her sons, and they don’t look starved to me. And I know for a fact she spends time with her boys. She even plays World of Warcraft with them and got addicted.

So why is she feeling guilty?

As women, we are taught to be a good mom we should spend all our waking hours worrying and fussing over our children, husband and home.

Here’s the deal, if your kids are big enough to work the microwave and can get things from the frig, then they’ll be fine for a few hours without you. Same goes for the husband or significant other. No matter how much they complain, they are not helpless and won’t starve.

My daughter knew I had an open door polices for her when she needed to talk. She’d sit down in the chair next to mine and wait till I got to a stopping place, and then we’d talk for a bit. Afterwards, she’d go back to her homework, and I went back to writing.

I’ve done all the important stuff: Holidays, birthday, field trips, shopping trips, and girl talks. I cook dinner most nights (Unless I guilt my hubby into doing it), and we eat together as a family.

I’ll admit there are days when the laundry piles up to the ceiling, and cleaning the toilet has become a waiting game of whose going to crack first, me or my husband.

When I started on this journey to be a writer, I knew there would be some sacrifices. One of these might be that the dust bunnies get another year’s reprieve, and the only thing that gets dusted is my laptop. But that’s okay—I’m writing the next book.

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Janice Seagraves lives in the same small town that she was born in raised in. She resides in a hundred year old house (not kidding) with her husband and daughter. They are owned by an overly affection cat and a Jack Russel that's in love with daughter (still not kidding).

Janice's website: http://janiceseagraves.org/

6 comments:

Paris said...

Be happy that you have a hubby you can guilt into cleaning the toilet, lol! As for guilt, I think of writing as a career and splitting up the work with hubby seems reasonable to me. I also don't see any harm in teaching a child to fend for themselves. It builds their self-esteem and keeps them from starving:)

Sandy said...

Janice, I think it's natural for women to put themselves on guilt trips. We were raised by women who did that, too.

Janice Seagraves said...

Hi Paris,

I think so too.

Hi Sandy,

Sadly that is so true.

Janice~

Faith Bicknell said...

You and I think a lot alike, Janice. Excellent blog post!

Kelley Heckart said...

I think women in general feel that they have to take care of everyone else first. I feel guilty if I don't clean the house or get the laundry done.

Janice Seagraves said...

Hi Faith,

Thank you. :)

Hi Kelley,

I think your right. :)

Janice~

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