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Sunday, July 29, 2012

Compromise

Compromise is very important in life.  You might think I am talking politics, but I am not, even though it does apply to our Congress.  Smile.  For relationships to survive it is necessary to have some give and take.  No one person can have everything his/her way. 

In our stories, the heroes and heroines will think alike on some things, but will have major differences on others. They will need to discuss their disagreements, or they will not get together, and if they are already a couple they will not remain one.

Life is full of conflicts. To write a book that will hold your readers attention; use disputes you are familiar with because you will feel closer to the character.  I have always used others experiences instead of my own, but I think you can get deeper into your characters if you know how they feel.  I'm going to use this idea in my next new story.  I'll even see if I can implement some of this thought in the present romantic suspense I'm writing. 

People who can't compromise and aren't tolerant of others make great secondary characters, but they can't be the hero or the heroine.  Not unless you can show them changing in their actions and their thought process, so they can have a happy ending. 

Do you agree your characters and the people around you in real life need to find the middle ground in their lives?

Thank you for reading.

Sandra K. Marshall
http://www.eirelander-publishing.com
http://www.sandramarshallblog.blogspot.com

10 comments:

Tina Donahue said...

Absolutely. When bodice rippers were in vogue, the heroes (IMO) were all jerks. It was their way or the highway. I like a hero with a sense of humor who can bend when he has to - especially when it's for his lady. :)

Sandy said...

Thanks, Tina. I remember the bodice rippers and heroes being jerks, but didn't we like it? lol We read them. Snort!

jean hart stewart said...

Of course I agree. Life is one big compromise, one way or another. But I loved the bodice rippers!

Sandy said...

LOL Me, too, Jean. You're right life is one big compromise.

Fran Lee said...

Most heroes have to be carefully taught to bend when needed...LOL! If they adore the heroine, they will bend as much as they most to win her. And some heroines must learn to bend. You are very right,Sandy...there must be a middle ground, or the twain shall not meet.

Fran Lee said...

Most heroes have to be carefully taught to bend when needed...LOL! If they adore the heroine, they will bend as much as they most to win her. And some heroines must learn to bend. You are very right,Sandy...there must be a middle ground, or the twain shall not meet.

Cara Marsi said...

Yes, I agree. Our books need conflict, then compromise between h/h to show their growth. I like stubborn heroines who finally learn to bend and give up some of their control. We all need to compromise in life. Otherwise, nothing gets done (Congress, anyone?)I have a friend who never, ever fights with her husband. She admitted they never fight because she does everything he wants. He makes all the decisions. Am I the only one who sees so much wrong with that?

Sandy said...

Fran, I got hold of my hero too late to train him. But, you're right about the training. lol

Cara, I'm sorry to hear that about your friend. Tell her she doesn't have to fight to put up a disagreement. I definitely see a lt wrong with that relationship. Is she afraid of him?

Cara Marsi said...

Sandy, my friend is not afraid of her husband. He'd never hurt her, but she's convinced he'll leave her if she doesn't go along with everything he wants. It has to do with her upbringing.

Sandy said...

I'm glad to hear that your friend's husband would never hurt her. I know in certain communities women are raised to obey.

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