The Difference between North & South

*** Before we get to the blog, let me seduce you with a contest. Anyone who comments on this post is entered. Winner chosen randomly with her choice of prize. Choice of prizes below.

Now, let’s get to it.

No, this blog isn’t about a geography lesson. What I’m referring to in the title is the difference between the brain (up North) and the groin (down South) when it comes to sex and most of all romance.

As some of you already know, I’m one of the co-hostesses at The Romance Room. During the last couple of days, I’ve had many authors write that they didn’t understand or didn’t see the difference between erotica and erotic romance.

Well, I’m here to educate them and anyone else who cares to listen that there is a HUGE difference between the two.

In erotica, it’s all about the sex – as ribald, frequent, and unusual as the writer can make it. What plot there is will be minimal. For example, the heroine may be a woman who’s been sexually repressed and is now on a journey to discover her inner vixen. In that kind of tale, romance isn’t a necessary component. Attraction and lust with the partner or partners is what it’s all about. This is what I call a groin-driven story…the action is South of the navel. It doesn’t reach the head and certainly never comes close to the heart. Some readers might liken it to porn.

On the other hand, erotic romance is romance no matter what you’ve heard to the contrary. There’s a love story, an emotional connection between two (and sometimes more) people. They ache for each other, you feel their pain when they’re separated, you’re cheering them on through the plot’s pitfalls and always rooting for an HEA, which you’ll get. This type of story starts in the brain (our biggest sex organ), travels to the heart then finally reaches the groin.

The only difference between erotic romance and a sweet love story is that there are explicit sex scenes in the former. Scenes, I might add, that enrich the story. If they’re gratuitous, they won’t satisfy readers and all erotic romance writers know that. So the scenes are woven into a complex set of circumstances that culminate in the expression of love between the characters. In other words, they’re like the best parts of real life.

I’m always puzzled by writers who dismiss erotic romance as something tawdry. Why? Because it explores the physical drive that’s so much a part of all of us? I find that rather arrogant. We’re all sexual creatures. IMHO, nothing is as comforting as the scent, texture and warmth of a lover’s skin, arms wrapped around willing bodies, gentle breaths tickling necks and ears and the full expression of passion while making love.

Trust me, it takes a lot of skill to write those scenes in a believable and moving fashion. It takes heart and thought to get them right.

Erotic romance is a fuller, richer more intense peek into the world we all live in or hope to live in.

So hug an erotic romance author today and tell her that you finally understand the difference between what she writes and straight erotica. She’ll be grateful you did.


*** Now to my contest. Simply leave a comment on this post or on today’s blog at my site www.tinadonahue.com and you’re entered. Winner gets her choice of one of my highly-praised books, including:

1. Adored – ebook
2. Deep, Dark, Delicious – ebook
3. Close to Perfect – mass market paperback
4. Bad Boys with Red Roses – trade paperback
5. Take My Breath Away – trade paperback

Details/covers/blurbs/excerpts on all of the above can be found at www.tinadonahue.com

(If winner is from the continental US, she gets her choice of any of the books. A winner outside the continental US gets her choice of one of the ebooks)