More puns for intelligent people!

Can't procrastinate any longer, this post needs posted. !!!! I've been working hard re-writing my very first published book, Druid's Daughter. As you know a lot of my old books have been in limbo for a while, and Druid's Daughter has always been a favorite of mine.  It's almost ready to go again, and now I'll concentrate on my post. I know you all seem to like my columns of puns, so here are some more....

1. I wondered why the baseball kept getting bigger.  Then it hit me.

2. A sign on the lawn at the rehab center said, 'Keep Off the Grass.'

3. The midget fortune teller who escaped from prison is a small medium at large.

4. The soldier who survived mustard gas and pepper spray is now a seasoned veteran.

5. A backward poet writes inverse.

6. In a democracy it's your vote that counts. In feudalism it's your count that votes. 

7.  When cannibals ate a missionary, they got a taste of religion.

8. If you jumped off the bridge in  Paris, you'd be in Seine.

9. A vulture boards an airplane carrying to dead raccoons. The stewardess looks at him and says, "I'm sorry sir, only one carrion per passenger."

10. Two fish swim into a concrete wall. One turns to the other and says "Dam!"

11. Two hydrogen atoms meet. One says, "I've lost my electron. The other says "Are you sure?" The first replies, "Yes, I'm positive."

12. Did you have hear about the Buddhist who refused Novocain during a root canal? His goal: transcend dental medication.

13. Two Eskimos sitting in a canoe were chilly so they lit a fire in the craft. Not surprisingly it sank, proving once again you can't have your kayak and heat it too.

14. There was the person who sent ten puns to friends in the hope that at least one of the puns would make the laugh. No pun in ten did.

Once again, you've got to vote for your favorite.  It's always a hard choice. But I love to know what you think.  

You can find me and my books at all the usual places. My Elusive Earl debuts next month, but more about that later. For now just enjoy the puns....